2019 GRADE D-F MOVIES

CHARLIE’S ANGELS: I walked out

They look like they can really fight, don’t they? Gimme a break.

Charlie’s Angels bombed in the box office, pulling in 3.1 million dollars on their opening day. It seems as though most of America passed on this movie, and those who didn’t, hated what they saw as only 49% of the audience would recommend it, according to PostTrak.

Many critics slammed this movie before its release and then, there was a handful of celebrated the flic because “It was less jiggle and more substance.” Really? So it’s better because it’s less sexist? Was the original Charlies Angel’s ever sexist? Are not women, by nature, beautiful and sexy? And thinking that – is sexist? Come on.

Nevertheless, since I thought professional movie connoisseurs were a joke, I threw their opinion out the window and used my hard-earned Regal movie points for the show.

I’m regretting it and I want my 18,000 points back.

After 30-minutes, I walked out. I couldn’t stand it.

I haven’t walked out of a lot of movies. To date, my walkouts include: Mr. Wrong, Noah, this movie, and another movie I can’t recall. I did sleep through Contact, god that was boring.

The entire movie was over-the-top, overacted, and it tried too hard to be cool. Every character seemed to have an irritating arrogance to themselves, as though they were just too awesome to do anything wrong. There was no balance of vulnerability or self-doubt in any of Charlie’s Angels, just a “Woe is me, hear me roar, I am woman” subtext echoed throughout the entire movie. The only vulnerable character was the “New Angel” whose mission was to embrace her naturally gifted woman power, to kick ass.

And honestly, it’s not the SJW narrative that got to me, it’s just that everything was just boring and unrealistic.

Charlie’s Angels is one of the worst movies of the year.

GRADE: F

Steve Young

Steve Young

I go by either "Steven" or "Steve" it really doesn't matter. I'm not a professional screenwriter anymore, so there's no need to suck up to me and send me your latest script. I have zero ambition to work in the entertainment industry. I'm now just a regular guy who knows a bit about storytelling, wants to share that knowledge to inspire new writers, and to share my work with everyone!
Steve Young